I believe every decision and action up on it is driven by emotion. Most intense are due to other people. Yes. Every time I create it is due to emotion trapped inside, created by someone from the past.
As a counsellor I can say that it has been reasonably common for clients to bring this experience to a session. I think when we are being creative we make space for all our unprocessed stuff to pop up.
This is a beautiful piece because it never overexplains what Kevin is. It leaves room for him to exist as memory, coping mechanism, companion, or something almost sacred, and that uncertainty is what gives the writing its power. The restraint works. Nothing is forced, and because of that, the emotion feels real.
What stood out most to me is the gentleness of it. “Not fixing it. Not changing what happened. Just softening it enough that I could stay in it” is such a strong articulation of what survival can look like. Not erasure, not healing in some neat dramatic sense, but just enough steadiness to remain present.
The ending is especially good. “I still don’t know if I created him or if he found me” lands because it speaks to the strange, intimate ways people survive unbearable things. This feels honest, haunting, and very tender.
Ive experienced this too and I’m so glad you shared it the way you did..
it makes me wonder.. isn’t it also how dreams work.. when we see all these characters.. which are only us.. idk just something to think ..
somewhere i also read that in the midst of creative flow, things bypass and the prefrontal cortex doesn’t register it.. so it feels like things flowing through us instead .. don’t mind my scientifically barely accurate way of explaining it..
i also find myself writing with different handwritings and in different ways and person… and it takes a moment to register.. that it is some strange part of me writing it..
who knows how it all happens.
The steady, warm comforting presence you’ve felt is also real. I have one too.. i think it’s me but i don’t know really..
thank you for sharing this peace. It appears painful. 🫂
Thanks so much for this thoughtful response. The part about different voices and the warm, steady presence really hit me. I don’t fully understand it either, but I’m grateful when someone else recognizes it.
Great read. Definitely had times in my writing where I felt like I wasn't alone, maybe inspiration or the muse, or memories of a loved one. I don't know
Oof, I related to this very heavily. A lot of things we hold inside seems to rush forward when we let our creativity flow. It's almost like we store those parts alongside it, or draw partly from there, too.
We build parts of our stories built on the life we have lived after all.
That’s exactly what it felt like. Like it was already there and just… came forward when I let it. I’m still not sure if that’s creativity or something else.
I almost didn’t post this because it felt a little strange to explain.
Curious if anyone else has ever had something like this happen while writing or remembering.
I believe every decision and action up on it is driven by emotion. Most intense are due to other people. Yes. Every time I create it is due to emotion trapped inside, created by someone from the past.
I’ve thought about that too. it would make sense if it was just something coming up from inside. it just didn’t feel like that when it was happening
As a counsellor I can say that it has been reasonably common for clients to bring this experience to a session. I think when we are being creative we make space for all our unprocessed stuff to pop up.
That makes a lot of sense. thank you, it definitely felt that way.
This is relatable 🫶
Your description of that unseen presence is so vivid and comforting. Very explorative writing ♥️
Yesss weird plot twists or words or characters come out of nowhere and I roll with it - see where it takes the story
This is a beautiful piece because it never overexplains what Kevin is. It leaves room for him to exist as memory, coping mechanism, companion, or something almost sacred, and that uncertainty is what gives the writing its power. The restraint works. Nothing is forced, and because of that, the emotion feels real.
What stood out most to me is the gentleness of it. “Not fixing it. Not changing what happened. Just softening it enough that I could stay in it” is such a strong articulation of what survival can look like. Not erasure, not healing in some neat dramatic sense, but just enough steadiness to remain present.
The ending is especially good. “I still don’t know if I created him or if he found me” lands because it speaks to the strange, intimate ways people survive unbearable things. This feels honest, haunting, and very tender.
Writing things down does the same thing to me.
Ive experienced this too and I’m so glad you shared it the way you did..
it makes me wonder.. isn’t it also how dreams work.. when we see all these characters.. which are only us.. idk just something to think ..
somewhere i also read that in the midst of creative flow, things bypass and the prefrontal cortex doesn’t register it.. so it feels like things flowing through us instead .. don’t mind my scientifically barely accurate way of explaining it..
i also find myself writing with different handwritings and in different ways and person… and it takes a moment to register.. that it is some strange part of me writing it..
who knows how it all happens.
The steady, warm comforting presence you’ve felt is also real. I have one too.. i think it’s me but i don’t know really..
thank you for sharing this peace. It appears painful. 🫂
Thanks so much for this thoughtful response. The part about different voices and the warm, steady presence really hit me. I don’t fully understand it either, but I’m grateful when someone else recognizes it.
Great read. Definitely had times in my writing where I felt like I wasn't alone, maybe inspiration or the muse, or memories of a loved one. I don't know
I know exactly what you mean, that feeling of not being alone in it. I never know what to call it either!
Like a hand on my back... so steady and close, like comfort that knows better than to speak too much~
Oof, I related to this very heavily. A lot of things we hold inside seems to rush forward when we let our creativity flow. It's almost like we store those parts alongside it, or draw partly from there, too.
We build parts of our stories built on the life we have lived after all.
Beautiful, work. Sending you much love. ❤️
That’s exactly what it felt like. Like it was already there and just… came forward when I let it. I’m still not sure if that’s creativity or something else.
I sometimes feel like it opens up some repressed memories and has them join in creating.
I needed Kevin in it, made it all even more meaningful.
everyone needs a Kevin!!! ❤️💜💙
that’s exactly it. it feels normal until you stop and really look at it… and then it doesn’t
thanks so much for reading 💜
This is really intense, and really beautiful in parts. I don’t know that I fully understand all of it, but I can feel it.
It feels like one of those chapters where everything is a lot, and then something shifts and you’re not the same after.
I’m really glad you shared this.